Current Obsession: Watching Brits Try Our Food!< absolutefutility >
I've been going on these "sabbaticals" into the world of Youtube to see new things. I have been getting all these ridiculous videos. Some were about people who were just awful doing stupid things. People's intelligence is on the decline, I'm sure. We've been watching it happen here on these forums for years.
But, lately, I've been seeing a bunch of videos that came through around the time all those Europeans were here for the World Cup.
They have these foreigners rushing out to try all those classic American dishes that they've heard about for so long but could never get in Europe and the UK.
Now, I have seen the opposite too. I have seen people come to America with the idea they're going to capture American's hearts and minds by opening up shops that sell Irish, British, Scottish foods. It worked for the Italians, the Indians, the Chinese and the French...why not the UKsians...
Well, I'll tell you why... The traditional food of the British Empire is bland as hell! I shouldn't need to remind you that there was an episode of The Great British Baking Show where the contestants were all tasked with making a hamburger...and none of them actually knew how to do it... That's the UK at its core. They don't eat food like we eat...almost everything they eat has to be eaten with a knife and fork. They don't have a monopoly on sandwiches like Americans do.
Hell, the food they have that we also have is always some pale imitation of what we have. Their sausages are terrible, their pizza is appalling, their burgers are tasteless, and their Chinese food bears no resemblance whatsoever to any Chinese food you've ever seen anywhere else... There are only three things they seem to get right - Indian food, mashed potatoes, and boiled eggs... And you'd think "not all together", but you'd be wrong.
So, when all these UKsians came to the US to see the World Cup, they decided to try all those foods that have haunted their dreams for all these years. The videos are spectacular!
The look on their face when they try biscuits & gravy for the first time, or grab a great hunk of BBQ rib, or see the portion sizes on our drinks, pizzas, and encounter or myriad salad dressing options is just fantastic! It is like seeing a kid opening presents on Christmas day.
I think someone should open a chain of restaurants throughout Europe that ONLY sell those types of foods, done in the American way, at American sizes, for the Europeans.
I love watching all those skinny bastards with their impossibly tiny bodies gorging themselves on our enormous portions and knowing that they'll be struggling to button their pants on the plane ride home!
This is one of the few things the internet does very well.
Have you seen foreigners experiencing our food for the first time?
I remember having a friend from Kiwiland, that's New Zealand for you uninitiated types, came over and I took him around to all the interesting places that he'd heard about but never seen. Curiously, it wasn't Walmart that he wanted to see...but Staples... I dunno why.
Then I took him to White Castle and he was so shocked by the size of the sliders and the smallness of their price!
He also was fascinated by Subway. Not the subway...but the sandwich chain. Getting the sandwich JUST the way you wanted was a big deal, I guess.
I remember a French girl I used to work with who was so pretentious that she refused to eat from ANY restaurant that wasn't sit-down. Then she'd whine about every little thing on the menu because it wasn't anything she was used to eating. I dunno why she cared, no matter what it was, it was always some frickin' salad with NO dressing, NO dairy, NO egg, and NO bread.